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― N'Zuri Za Austin

The Most Valuable Secret to Adulting: Surviving Your 20's

Friday, September 8, 2017


Truth be told, when that clock struck 12am on June 1st 2012 I thought I was entering into the wonder years. I really believed that life couldn’t get ANY better being 21 and that it would be the best decade of my life. Little did I know that I was entering into some strange type of twilight zone, where bills had to get paid on time and responsibilities were really a ‘thing’.

Your 20’s are supposed to be your prime. It’s the decade where most people find love and heck, even make it! It’s supposed to be filled with laughter and prosperity, but how is it that most of us young women, or even young men, end up in the total opposite spectrum? Because adulting is beyond hard! No course in high school or undergraduate schooling could possibly prepare you for what was to come.

It’s a funny thing to actually expect that someone is going to hand us the Beyoncé life on a gold platter but we all dream it.
"What do you do when you feel like you’re living a decade from hell while in your 20’s?"
Gather your resources and act fast. If there was anything I learned from my earlier 20 years is to take advantage of any and all opportunities. Most of my early 20’s were spent in the What if realm.

What if I can’t do my job right?

What if I move and can’t find a new network?


What I never considered were my absolutes like…


I absolutely have the ability to create a new network as I did it before

I absolutely can start my own career if I have proper guidance and drive


Most times we as millennials miss golden opportunities because we are fearful. I believe that we are fearful of actually succeeding because we won’t know what to do with ourselves.


Photo credit: Create HER stock

The Golden Rule for Your 20’s?

Currently, I am in my mid 20’s and I am still struggling, but thanks to Zakiyrah Ficklin’s Her 20 Somethings guide, I have managed to
1. Gather great resources 
2. Act fast on the resources

As aforementioned most of our defeats are due to the shortcomings of our ability to take action. This book has become an ultimate catalyst to a fresh start in my journey to surviving my 20’s.

Out of the 20 tips Zakirah provides in her book the Golden Rule that I took away from the book was:

It’s okay to ask for help


As a millennial we really do have that “I can do it all by myself attitude” because we want to prove to the naysayers that we are fully equipped with the skills and knowledge we need to exceed. Though it may be true for some, most of us honestly don’t have everything we need. There is absolutely nothing wrong with asking for a loan or even solid advice to get your feet wet as you emerge into your success.


What I love most about Ficklin’s resource is its interactive pages. Usually when I read a book it’s just simply reading but this resources has thought provoking questions that allow introspection and deep rooted reflection to help me truly understand where I fit into this equation.



I would love to share even more wealth from this book but truth is, it would be such an ineffective experience and disservice to yourselves if you don’t check it out for yourself. Ficklin allowed me to take a journey alongside Monica, the main character, and learn from her mistakes and successes.

If you are a struggling millennial woman like myself or even just want invaluable advice I urge you to check out Her 20 Somethings. There is a large amount of suggestions that serves as a navigation tool that I am itching to share but just won’t make much sense without having read the book. It’s a great resource to keep by your side when you are in need of motivation and a reason to take action!

Update: Watch the Promo ad I created for 'Her 20 Somethings' book in my recent post here

What’s something you’ve struggled with while in your 20’s? Leave me a comment below.

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1 comment

  1. That book looks very interesting! I have to check this out, thanks for sharing! I like that article x

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